Thursday, February 21, 2013

Quitting your job doesn't make you a stay at home mom


This week is a school break so a lot of my friends and my family are home with school aged children and trying to keep them occupied. The weather has been terrible for the last month or so- freezing cold but not enough snow on the ground for any kind of fun. As for my little one and I, it’s been a bit of a slow week because we haven’t been to any of our usual activities. Some were cancelled due to school break and some we stayed away from for fear that they’d be packed full of school kids. It made me realize how much of my week involves activities for a 20 month old! (And how long a day is if there isn’t an outing)

Talking with friends who are home this week and are feeling so glad to be able to catch up on time with their little ones makes me so grateful that I have been able to spend so much time with our son and fill his days with as much learning, bonding, and happy moments as I can.

There are a lot of people who claim to be a stay at home mom that I think miss the point in being home. I saw it a lot in a previous job where the term meant little more than physically being there at home with their children and sometimes didn’t even mean that much! Not to say that every mom can or should dedicate the majority of each day to children’s activities but that is what I have chosen to do, otherwise why wouldn’t I just work and pay someone else to dedicate their day to my child? Without coming off too judgmental, I’ll just say that I know mothers who work full time that spend more time engaged with their children than some that claim to be stay at home moms.

To me being a stay at home mom means that your full time job is ensuring the health, development, happiness, growth, and well being of your children. It doesn't mean do whatever I want during the workday whether it be work out, shop, go to lunch with friends, etc,  while someone else watches my child. Stay at home moms who do things like that give the impression that it's fun and games rather than a demanding committment being "home" with your children!
 I am just grateful that I won’t look back some day and wish that I’d spent more time with my children while I was “home” with them.

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